


Somebody I Used To Know (1/?)

by jackiewalsh2013



Category: My Mad Fat Diary
Genre: Drama, F/M, Future, Multi, Teens, Unplanned Pregnancy, relationships
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-02-13
Updated: 2015-04-01
Packaged: 2018-03-12 05:24:24
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,869
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3345185
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jackiewalsh2013/pseuds/jackiewalsh2013
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>(Title and lyrics are from "Somebody That I Used To Know"  By Gotye Ft Kimbra)</p>
<p>Allona  is Rae’s baby sisters name it also means strong</p>
<p>Rae and Finn, summer flings,love, university and unexpected problems anything could happen.<br/>Its around 4,000 words, it was going to be one part but now it will be two possibly three, Enjoy!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

But you didn't have to cut me off Make out like it never happened and that we were nothing  
She had once stupidly fallen for someone in her life, it was a summer fling with a boy a year older than she was, at the time it was like magic, a new whirlwind romance, she fell hard for him, at seventeen she was young and stupid and wanted a new adventure but once it was over and he had left and gone to university he didn’t come back for her, she didn’t contact him either, it was better that way, he was nineteen, he went to live his life away from her, Stamford and his new friends, he fitted in like they had all known him for years well Archie had known his years they were cousins apparently Finn’s mum and dad had split up so Finn came to live with Archie for the summer, then he would leave to start back at university, he had become good friends with Chop, once he had gone the gang would mention him occasionally but Rae just walked away when his name was said the tears where still far to fresh at the time, it was back to reality again, she couldn’t remember what he looked like anymore she had pushed him to the back of her mind far away never to be seen again, just so she could forget everything that happened that summer and move on with her new life.

Well she had just gone and done it, her life had just turned out to be one big mess, she never said the baby belonged to Chris he just assumed that it was his even after months of not being together turned out he could be very obsessive about her so she got out of there sharpish, he was very adamant that it most definitely was his, she had put him right very publicly in the common room after he let slip to all his uni friends, so everyone knew she was expecting now.  
Well that was rubbish it belonged to her one night stand, a man she couldn’t remember the name of, they met at a party, had a kiss, then parted after a one night stand, she could have sworn he looked like someone she had once known but couldn’t quite put her finger on it.

The typical happy ever after didn’t work for Rae, it just wasn’t what she was looking for in a man, he was nice and kind and said she was beautiful, so she took a chance on sex with a complete stranger and ended up with nothing but a crumpled old piece of paper with a phone number scribbled down left next to her cushion the next morning, she woke up alone like always, and he also left her apparently up the duff as you say.

Rumours spread like wildfire at uni, they where all children again slagging her off behind her back even her friend Jane she met in first year had succumbed to talking behind her back, she never really connected with Jane, they were friends sure but not somebody you would stop and tell all your secrets to that was for true friends like Chloe or Izzy, it had been a long time since she last saw the gang all together in one room again but not Finn after the split he moved to Leeds and never came back she once thought she had seen him but she didn’t her mind had been playing those annoying tricks on her again.

She quit finally after losing the willpower to carry on with uni, she had phoned the number and a very rude sounding woman answered and asked her very kindly if she could ring back when Mr Nelson was not in a meeting and slammed the phone down before she even spoke a single word, she could only imagine him being some hot shot superstar millionaire thing you see in the papers but that couldn’t be right, could it?.

So the minute she put the phone down she decided to grab as much of her stuff she could fit in her tiny car and left for Stamford, Lincolnshire, once again running back to the town she had spent so many years trying to escape from but it was now her safety blanket, It once scared her to think she would ever want to come back here yet times change in life, so you need to do things you despise.

Driving passed the ‘Welcome to Stamford’ sign, she could see herself bringing her child up here, it wasn’t a bad town, i was just bad for her but people change and places change, it had definitely changed a lot since her childhood, new buildings where going up everywhere around her, she remembered spending many Saturday afternoons in the local record shop but that had shut down a few years ago because now they had YouTube and the internet know one bought any music from the shop, it closed just like the chippy and the old lady at the sweet shop had died a year previous, no more sweets either, they had been replaced with modern upmarket shops and coffee houses, far too posh for Stamford.

Her mum Linda married Karim when she was sixteen and soon after the had a baby together, Allona it did have a meaning behind it Rae had once said she is a strong baby she can pull through anything and that’s where the name came from, her mum had been frilled to find out she was pregnant and a little upset that there was still know man in the picture but that’s just the modern age of the world, single mums where just as good as two parents these days, if her mum could do it so could she.

The drive back had been a one of torture she glanced at the path waiting for the light to turn green and Chloe appeared waving like a madwoman and demanded she pull over at once, Rae declined and said to meet later and that she had big news, Chloe jumped to conclusion asking who he was what did he look like how long have you been together, but let her down gently explaining she’s still single but its massive news, tell the gang to meet at the pub too.

Rae had tried to come back when she could, but plans don’t always work and Chloe decided she would stay in Stamford after meeting a very nice boy called Tom, they were both happy and expecting the last time Rae had heard, Archie had left for Leeds to study at some special history university, he was happy, free and single, Izzy and Chop didn’t leave either but Izzy did go to hull university for a short time, they split up, long distance wasn’t there thing they stayed friends and rekindled their love when she returned a year and half later, Danny was still at college doing a course to help him become more independent and to have a new lease on life, to meet new people and find out who he now was.

Linda was so happy to have her daughter home again but she understood that Rae needed to find her feet and start planning for her and the baby’s future, Rae had once dreamt about having the perfect family, the house, the dog, the car and the perfect husband but you can’t have everything in life.

Her room hadn’t changed one bit the red walls remained, the band posters looked a little more dated, the slight sprinkle of dust covering her record player, she had amazed herself by leaving it behind but she didn’t want to risk any damages, dumping her suitcase on the bed she had unzipped the case and carefully removed all her things and put most of them away apart from the picture of her friends, the picture was old, it was from the first summer when she met the gang through Chloe, and the same summer she dated him, it was a glorious summer, camping was fun but she enjoyed the spending most evenings in the pub listening to Chop babble on about any old CRAP , they were the days she missed the most.

——

Chloe and her big fat gob, well she can’t keep a secret to save her life, Chloe rushed Rae into the toilets as soon as she stepped through the pub door.

"Rae I’ve missed you so much, how are you!" Chloe gave Rae a bone crushing hug.

"Oh you know Im fine well were fine" she pointed to her stomach .

"You’re pregnant!"

"Well yeah but don’t t…."

queue Chloe’s extremely girly scream and hugging Rae than sprinting out of the toilets shouting Rae’s pregnant, oh and Finn stepping through the door then stopping dead in his tracks, looking straight at Rae.

"Hi"

"Err yeah hi" Finn walked passed her to the bar, a look of shock on his face.

——

"Rae it’s been a while lass" Chop hugged her followed by Archie, then Izzy.

"So tell me everything Rae" Izzy was bursting at the seems for more information.

Finn sat down opposite Rae; she suddenly realized why she knew his face again.

"Why the hell are you here!?" Rae shouted standing up again, it wasn’t that she hated him anymore it was the fact he never rang her back or bothered to communicate through friends.

"It’s a free country Rae; i can do what i wish"

"Why didn’t you call me back?"

"Well i was busy with work, infact i don’t even remember any messages from you

i don’t even have your number"

"i did speak to some snobby women she said you was in a meeting"

"i work for a living Rae, why you back in Stamford?, what do you want anyway?"

"Moved back in with my mum for a while and it doesn’t matter I’ll deal with it"

"Rae just tell me!"

"No it really doesn’t matter" she began to walk away from the table.

”tell me!” he stopped her at the pub door.

"i knew something wasn’t right, that i knew your face from somewhere and it just had to be you didn’t it!, that one night stand has ruined my future Finn!, god i was so drunk, how did i still not realize it was you"

"What does all that even mean Rae?"

"It means you didn’t wear a condom you dickhead, figure that one out and stay away from me!" she pushed him away and ran out of the pub.

\-----

Wake up Rae  
Wake up Rae  
Wake up Rae  
Tomorrows another day…  
\-----  
Dream the day away Rae

There first kiss was perfect, even if it was in the boys smelly changing rooms at Finn’s football match, she had been talking rubbish, so he shut her up with a kiss, it was better then kissing Archie even better then her large CD collection.

The red cabbage incident was also still firmly stuck in her memory, Linda her mum walking in asking for some red cabbage interrupting her and Finn’s first intimate encounter, Finn rushed off but later explained it was a little embarrassing her mum just walking in like that, so Rae made him fit a sturdy lock to her bedroom door, never to be interrupted again.

After that they decided to never leave the door open or unlock, but you can’t help it if you forget these things, Finn did just once, Karim walked in just as Finn had taken Rae’s top off and started on his own not noticing Karim had walked in just yet, Rae screamed grabbing the covers, Finn jumped up looking at very awkward Karim, “Get out!” was screamed at Finn, He never got over that took him a long time to allow Finn back in the house with door wide open.

\-----

The hospital smelt just like it had done all those years ago, the stale bleach smell wafting in the air, the clinical coloured white walls, the varnished gray floors; it was the same as before, it hadn’t changed one bit.

It was a good thing to be here this time, she had begrudgingly dragged herself out of bed to make the appointment today it was for her first scan, twelve weeks the doctor had said and booked an appointment straight away, the midwife was nice but aged beyond her years, the gel was freezing on her stomach, the monitor zapped on, and a tiny blob appeared on the screen.

She left feeling the hospital feeling like she was cloud nine, with the three scan photos one for her, one for her mum and maybe one for him, that was a different problem he lived away in London most of the time, she kept in touch with his dad.

So why should she tell him about the scan, it was her child now, not his; he was really just the sperm donor now.

\---

'My mum was right about once every three years and this time she was just simply right'

It wasn’t that she didn’t wan to ring him and talk about the ‘their’ but she didn’t have the ‘balls’ to do it, how could she sit and talk to the man she had longed after for so long, the future she had desired was certainly out of her grasp now who would take on a women pregnant to another man, she would forever remain alone, just Rae no one else.

\---

It had been four months since she last spoke a word to Finn, she would see him in the pub, he would watch her walk around the pub, never taking his eyes away from her, he had asked to speak to her through Archie, knowing she would talk to Archie about him at one point but she refused to have anything to do with him again, Archie had tried to explain and told her think about the baby growing inside her it might need a dad one day,

“Arch I’m not doing it!” Rae was frustrated with Archie, he was clearly talking out of his arse, persuading her to speak to Finn was not going to happen.

“Rae please just calm down it’s not good for you or the baby” Archie had tried again to talk Rae around, but was having no luck she was even more stubborn then usual.

“Don’t tell me to calm down!, he is not having anything to do with me or the baby, I’ve told you this just make him accept it and move on”

“Rae just listen, he wants to know his child please, if not him then do it for the babies sake, just think about it yeah?”

“Fine I’ll think about it”

“Great now that’s out of the way how about I buy you a drink?” Archie grinned stirring Rae towards the bar, leaving Chloe and Izzy gobsmacked having listened to the whole argument, they knew Rae would come around soon enough she was only a few short months of giving birth she needed Finn even if she didn’t know it yet.

Chloe could remember when they were first together they were so good together, it wasn’t just two teens messing around, it was two teens falling hopelessly in love with each other, she never did find out why they broke up to begin with, Finn left but long distance could of worked some how, know was there time, there time to grow up and get along for the baby, Chloe had tried to talk about Finn to Rae but she change the subject so fast Chloe nearly got whiplash, when Rae didn’t want to talk about something she would be so unbelievably stubborn and sarcastic even Chloe got frustrated with her.

Rae came back from the bar, she knew Chloe had listened to the whole conversation but she was just being nosey, Rae didn’t need that crap at the moment.

She took a sip of the blackcurrant juice Archie so kindly bought her, she watched Archie sitting down in front of her drinking down the pint like it was water, god how she missed drinking with out a care in the world.

“What?” Archie spotted her staring at his pint.

“nothing, god I miss fucking drinking Arch, only two more months left of this” she poked her protruding stomach the baby bump clearly visible through the t-shirt.

She only just managed to squeeze into the one, usually she would have two on, a long sleeved top and then a t-shirt other the top but that was no more a choice for her, she had considered wearing something of her mums old clothes, but quickly dismissed that when she saw the bright pink frilly thing sitting at the top of the pile, her leather jacket wouldn’t even zip up anymore but it was all for a reason to bring her baby into the world, the baby was growing fast Rae had nothing prepared for it, her mum was helping ‘thankgod’, she could do this she didn’t need him now or ever, it was her and the baby against the world together, she wouldn’t have it any other way, well apart from the strechmarks they can just fuck right off.

“Hey I’ll be officially uncle Archie!” he laughed felling her bump.

“Shut up Arch” idiot

\---

Finn had tried to get her to listen but she wouldn’t talk to him even if they were the only ones around it just wasn’t happening, he had been to the pub the other day but he saw Rae there and Archie with his hand on her bump so he left not wanting to ruin the moment.

He knew Archie was gay well everyone did but he couldn’t shake the feeling of being slightly jealous of him touching her bump, yet he hadn’t even been near her in days even weeks, he hadn’t even touched the at all bump, it was his child growing inside her, but knew he would never get the old Rae back because he left Stamford and never came, it was all his fault, the one night stand was when he first saw her, she looked just like the old Rae not changing in the few years they had apart, infact she was more beautiful then he remembered, he had to have her that night he never expected her not to notice who he was, they talked and drunk a ridiculous amount of alcohol that night and ended up in bed he woke up first just staring at her watching her sleep, he got a little scared and left before she had the chance to recognise him, he only left his number, just incase, so now all he needed was a new plan, the Archie plan hadn’t worked for far, he had to take matters into his own hands.

Or just wait until she left the pub and talk to her then.

\---

He sat on the bench in front of the pub doors just watching and waiting she would eventually need some fresh air it was stuffy in the pub at the best of times, she breezed out looking a little off colour, hair swishing around in the wind as she walked past him.

“Rae?”

She froze he had seen it, just as she was walking a few steps away from him, she turned and stared blankly at him.

She so wished he hadn’t been out side, the tears were threatening to fall she was emotional and full of hormones and not in the best of moods today.

“What Finn?”

“We need to talk about this situation”, she stared at him so hard before she answered he thought she could read his mind.

“What do you mean ‘this situation’ there is no situation?”

“Rae I’m talking about our baby”

“I know you dickhead and it’s not ‘our baby’ it’s mine you lost that right when you didn’t call me back!”

“I didn’t even know you called me, I was busy in a meeting”

“being in a meeting isn’t an excuse Finn, you should of rang me back straight away, I don’t care what the hell you were fucking doing in that meeting, I just needed you right then and you didn’t care, you cared more about your job!”

“Please just shut up and listen it was an important meeting okay, I needed to be there and I left my phone in my office because well how was I suppose to know you’d ring telling me you were pregnant after a drunken one night sta…”

“what do you mean a drunken one night stand is that all I was to you!, because let me tell you that’s all you were Finn, how could you lie to me telling me you name was Rob a mean who the fuck does that, how did I not know it was you, you’ve changed, quit a lot from the Finn I used to know, I only realised when that snobby cow answered your phone..”

“What exactly did she say to you Rae?”

“All she said was that you were in some meeting and then told me to ring back when you’re not busy then she hung up on me, come on Finn what does that even mean am I meant to read bloody minds now?, because I couldn’t with that stupid stuck up cow!”

“Sorry look she should of took a message I guess, but you could of rung me back Rae”

“No Finn I couldn’t ring you back that was up to you, your choice not mine, you! And you never did so just look this is the end of it all now, move on with your life”

“No Rae I’m not moving on why would you tell me to do that?”

“Because you’ve got your whole life ahead of you still, unlike me I’m stuck here now!, just go live your life Finn!”, she tried to walked away the sensation in her stomach had stopped her, the muscles in her belly had tightened, they had done before but never before a wave of dizziness came over her, another sudden shock of pain ripped through her stomach, shooting straight down to her legs, it almost winded her, the last she saw was Finn running to her as she hit the ground.

“RAE!” Finn ran to Rae cradling her head on his lap shouting for someone to help him.

'Now you're just somebody that I used to know'


	2. How long will I love you?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy!...

How long will I love you?  
As long as stars are above you  
And longer, if I can.  
How long will I need you?  
As long as the seasons need to  
Follow their plan.

He could still remember the good old days, back to the start of there connection, the unsteady beginnings, neither he or Rae spoke to each other for the first three days of Rae joining the gang, Too him she was just some lass Chloe knew from school, he ignored her hoping she wouldn’t make a stamp on the group but she did she burst into the gang spreading laughter and happiness, her jokes where the best one time he spat beer all over the table from laughing to much and Chop fell off his stool a few times that summer.

His feelings towards her had taken on another whole meaning, he wanted to be next to her every single second and minute of the day, the secret messages under the table was just a simple excuse for him to touch her, he never did admit that, he asked her out with his new made up secret language, surprisingly she blushed the colour of a tomato and then lightly placed on the palm of his hand replying ‘yes’ with a shy smile playing on her lips, from that moment they became inseparable, spending long hot summer afternoons tangled together in Finn’s bed or hers they had options and plenty of empty room in the back of Finn’s car.

Then it ended just like a puff of smoke in the air, the bliss of being together was gone he had to leave, there was know going back, university called his name he didn’t even want to go but his mum’s new fella paid half of his fee’s so he kind of just made the effort to TRY IT for a while and ended up staying for last few years, but even though Rae was having his baby he still had a JOB to go back to and she had university if she was ever going to go back, only time would tell.  
—-

Rae’s body collapsed into his arms, she went limp resting on his chest, her eyes fluttered closed, a pale grey colour spread across her face.

‘All we can do is do our best, to relish this remarkable ride’

 

—-

 

Linda was beside herself, Rae had found out she was pregnant, she didn’t expect that bombshell, she had always admired Rae for being strong willed just like her, so similar yet they were both completely different, they would slash like brown and red but that was just there strong personality’s, they each had there own faults and bad thoughts, only once Rae did act on them, that was a truly bad memory for her, she could still remember standing alone in the corridor, Rae’s body had been wheeled away into theatre, she remembered the foul tasting coffee, staring blankly at the hospital wall waiting for news of her daughter, if she survived that she could survive allot more of the things that got thrown her way.

 

when she answered the phone to a frantic Finn, she felt a sudden rush of fear run straight through her body, not like last time because that was in the past and Rae had a future.

 

The nurses came and went bustling past him in the corridor without so much as giving him a second glance, or a fierce look in some cases, he could still remember the pub doors crashing open the gang and other pub patrons running around organising an ambulance, some bringing blankets and Izzy and Chloe kneeling next to him holding Rae’s hands, it was like something horrible had reached within him and suddenly ripped out his heart, he held her hand tightly watching her sleep, he sat by her bed all evening until Linda arrived, he sat speaking to her about the baby and that he would always be there even if she couldn’t stand him right now, but she was stubborn and so was he, that’s why they used to fit together all those years ago, just like two pieces of Lego they could always fit as one, know matter what shape or volume they were. 

 

—-

The intense brightness of the light above hit her eyes, it hurt to open them at first but she still stirred awake, the feel of someone’s presence next to her talking had stirred her from her deep sleep, she squinted at the drip attached to her hand, she stared at the white ceiling for a moment focusing her eyes, her mum was next to her crying softly with Karim at her side.

“Mum?” she whispered her throat to dry to speak loudly.

“Oh my god Rae!, Karim get the doctor now!, oh baby are you okay?”

“What am I doing here mum?”

A woman walked in wearing blue scrubs carrying a clipboard.

“Rae? Hi I’m Laura your Doctor, it’s nice to have you back with us I understand you had contraction like pains earlier and collapsed, we’ve checked you over and decided it’s better for you both to stay in over night just to be on the safe side”.

“So what happened why did she faint?”

“What you experienced earlier Rae, were called Braxton hicks there very similar to normal contractions, but just as painful, you are a little dehydrated it will explain your thirst, you fainted because you were either in a stressful situation or just simply extremely tired

it does occurs in a lot of pregnancies but it is always best to get checked over” Rae looked at the Doctor not really taking much in.

 

“you have a urine infection, a lot of pregnant women are more prone to the infection than anyone else, this is partly due to the hormonal changes in your body Rae, also because of the change to your body your urine tract tends to SLOW down the flow of urine you pass hence causing the infection, now the antibiotics

you will be taking will kill the BACTERIA that was found in your sample, it’s very common in pregnancies to get this, please try not to worry, you can hopefully go home tomorrow, get some rest, I’ll send a nurse to check on you soon and just to you let you all know visiting hours will be over in about half an hour”.

 

—

“Where’s Finn?”

“Finn?, Oh him he’s outside, he wouldn’t leave he’s been there all night, I shunt think why you two where over years ago”

“Can you tell to just go home please, I don’t want him here yet” Linda looked at her daughter confused

“Why don’t I call Chris see if he can down to see you, he is the dad Rae he needs to know when your ill and in here” she stood to leave, Rae was clearly to disorientated in her eyes to think straight.

“No please tell Finn to go home”

“Okay well shall i let Chris know to?”

“No!, he’s nothing to do with this if you would just let me get a word in for once, he’s not the dad, Finn is okay!”, Rae watched the shocked run other her mothers face, then she sighed as if in relief.

“Well I am shocked Rae how could you do that, I thought you was still with Chris well it doesn’t bloody surprise me you don’t tell me anything anymore, the poor lad he didn’t deserve that one!”

“We split up, it didn’t work we where just far too different, that same day I went to the club and I met Finn again but I didn’t know it was him at first, I was just drunk and i don’t know I let my self loose control like that or why I was so stupid but it was a good mistake…for once I guess”

“Huh, so that’s why he’s been sat outside there all night!, you need to talk to him please Rae!”.

“Just leave me alone mum!…I don’t want to see him just now” she whispered.

“No Rae it has to be done, does he even know it’s his?!”

—-

Karim slowly opened the door leaving quietly, slightly afraid of world war three breaking out between mother and daughter.

As predicted Karim heard Rae shout and Linda shouted back just as loud, he looked around to see Finn slumped in one of the tacky old plastic chairs, clear to him he hadn’t moved at all that evening.

—- 

Finn looked up hoping it was Rae leaving but it wasn’t it was Karim, she had once said to him Karim was basically like her real dad even though he wasn’t, but blood isn’t always thicker then water, she later explained she sometimes called him dad but mostly not because she couldn’t quit get over her real dad abandoning her when she was a baby but she’s lived without him for this long now she just doesn’t need him in her life, he had his chance.

“Rae wants to see you to go home son, I think its for the best let her err…she needs rest and there arguing in there” he pointed to the door Rae and Linda where behind, “don’t come between mother and daughter you only get your head bit off” Karim laughed at the memory, an explosive argument broke out between them it had been brewing for days it was just a matter of time he had stepped in and got a gob full from Linda, he made a note to never do that again, it usually just sizzled out after a few hours.

—-

 

After the short stretch in hospital she was ordered home to rest, well that was easy she found herself looking at her baby sister and mum it was like staring at her future, Linda took every thing Rae had ever said to her with a pinch of salt, she remembers the time at the beach when she asked why she was bigger then other mums, Linda was amazing putting up with so much of her CRAP, there was no better mum in the world she could have ever wished for, but still back to the thing growing in side of her, it was pretty huge now and she hated to admit that she felt huge like the size of a house; she could even rest the TV remote on the bump now, it wasn’t a good feeling, but Archie had popped by with two t-shirt for her saying ‘under construction’ and another saying ‘bun in the oven’, she had laughed so much, she had changed into one of them straight away.

—-

 

Finn had nested himself in his old room for the past week, looking at the phone sat waiting, Rae had been sent home she hadn’t seen him at all, he always waited until everyone had gone and when she was sleeping, he would sneak into her room and just sit and watch her sleep for a while, it certainly wasn’t creepy at all,

He just wanted to see her when it was quiet and peaceful, now she had been back for a few days he hadn’t done a thing to get in touch with her, he was waiting for her to get better first, it was the least he could do after all he was part to blame for stressing her out, he had a feeling it wasn’t going to end very well when they talk, he had to leave soon he was losing money just staring at his old bedroom ceiling, he just couldn’t make himself leave not yet, he and Rae had unfinished business to discuss, a few more days wouldn’t hurt.

—-

He rang her that night with an explanation, he needed to see her, to talk about there future, she had argued with him saying she needed her space and she didn’t want to get anxious or stressed and to leave the talking till later, he kept talking, he confused her so much with all his babbling, she had huffed and agreed to talk.

—-

She gave him small smile as she sat down on the plush red sofa, it felt to strange to be in the same room after not properly taking for so long out side the pub didn’t really count, nothing important had been said.

“Are you sure your okay, I could just come to yours Im sure your mum still loves to have me around the house”

“I’m fine know, the doctor said that I was just a bit dehydrated”

“Tea?” He took it as some kind of hint or a peace offering, he hadn’t decided on that one.

“God no!, the stuff makes me throw up” she laughed, “juice is fine though but not orange”

As he returned he place the juice in front of her and taking a seat again.

“So what’s there to talk about?” she took a sip of blackcurrant, watching his face carefully.

“Well surely the baby”

“okay what do you want to know?”

“How longs left?”

“Six weeks”

“Is it a boy or girl?”

“I don’t know, didn’t ask”

“Do you need anything for it, cloths, money?”

“No mums sorting it”

“But I can help you, ill be there”

“If you want too that’s fine but like you know I don’t wan this to experience the childhood I had so if you wan to be in its life then you can but if you fuck up even once then you’re gone”

As the weeks got nearer, So did she and Finn, he had bought multiple things for the baby, bringing little things around to her mums, the latest had been a Moses basket, she had cried buckets of tears and cringed shamefully at herself, hormones she had explained to a scared looking Finn.

They became close, with just three weeks left they had the birth plan set in stone, her mum and Finn would be there, with the extra add on’s, Rae had decided she wanted ice cream and music to be present and also Chloe for more support and the gang to wait out side for the arrival of baby Nelson.

The was no name, the baby was officially name less to the present day, it was hard neither like each others suggestions, the last name had been a tiny battle but Rae had agreed that it was a nice thing to do to carry on the name Nelson.

—-

It started as a SLOW burning in the bottom of the back and it slowly raised up, into a sharp pain tugging on her insides and she screamed the house down, she was on top form she lungs working over time, Linda had called Finn then Chloe explaining they needed to move fast this baby was certainly not waiting for anyone.

Minutes later both Chloe and Finn burst through the maternity wards doors

—-

“Well done Rae keep going she’s nearly here!” Chloe said gripping Rae’s hand tightly back.

“Oh shut up Chloe, just wait until it’s your fucking turn!” Rae screeched, the nurse slowly moved around to Rae and gently placed a chubby baby in her arms.

——

It felt like know other feeling she had ever had, it was simply amazing having the baby in her arms, she was so proud of the little thing she and Finn had created, she was almost bursting into tears again.

“I think she looks like a Lilly Rose Nelson, Finn?”

“Hmm?” he had fallen asleep, somewhere between Rae napping and the gang visiting and leaving.

“her name what do you think, Lilly Rose Nelson” she gently kissed Lilly’s head.

“It’s perfect Rae” He kissed Rae’s forehead then Lilly’s

—- 

She loved the fresh summer breeze whipping through her hair as she strolled in the park, parenthood was certainly strange to Rae, surprisingly she had taken to it more better then Finn, he had moved in for few days but left her mum’s a week and moved back home to his dad’s, explaining he needed concentrate on his work, well that had prompted an explosion and they argued constantly after that, eventually she made him stay away and he didn’t try to get in touch, just occasionally dropped off some odd bits for Lilly.

—-

As opened the door she saw the look on his face, the same apologetic look the day they split up all those years ago, she knew this would be the end it just wasn’t working for them, but she had to use the last bit of strength in her to fight for there family, even if he wouldn’t.

“Why are you doing this?”

“Because we both know it’s right”

“Right for who!, I don’t understand how you could even think this was the best thing to do Finn”

“Just trust me, it’s the best for us all, we need space and time to think this through”

“To think what through!, it’s so simple you to be in both our lives, just why?”

“I just need more time”

“Fine get out!” Rae cried.

“Please Rae, I need to explain!”

“No I think you’ve just clarified that you regret us both being any part of your perfect little life, I just don’t know you anymore the Finn I knew and loved was so…actually there’s know words for the old you, you’ve changed and I hate you right now! ” she slammed the door in his face.

—-

To Mae and Bump,

Rae you know long distance wasn’t for us, how could we even do it again and with a baby?, last time it was fine and then you started missing me, I missed you so much too, please believe, it just didn’t work we can’t do that again, it’s not the relationship you need right now, Im sorry Rae but I do need to go back to London, my JOBS there and we both know this isn’t the best thing for us all, especially in your condition, I’ll pay my share

and I’ll visit at every chance I can, please understand how sorry I am to do this, I’m not leaving because of anything you have done, don’t blame yourself coz I know you Mae, so don’t do it!, it’s for you both, for all our futures, you both need stable homes and I can’t provide that for you yet, it won’t be for long, I’ll come back for you, I always do girl.

 

Love Finn….Xx

Ps, lets never argue again, I’m sorry, call me please?

—-

We’re all travelling through time together  
Every day of our lives.  
All we can do is do our best  
To relish this remarkable ride..


End file.
